Archive for the '1.11 VaYigash' Category

Being Present for a Difficult Topic

Published December 19, 2012 1.09 VaYeshev , 1.11 VaYigash , 6 Hanukah , Uncategorized 2 Comments
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Two week’s ago in the Torah portion we saw Yaakov give Yosef a coat of many colors. While this special gift was supposed to be an expression of love between a father and a son, for his brothers it was a sign of Yaakov’s unfairly favoring Yosef. This led them to sell Yosef into slavery. In our Torah portion this week Yosef is finally reunited with Yaakov. It is interesting to note that he is not interested in any more presents, only his father’s presence. Last week we celebrated Chanukah and we very deliberate to get each of our children presents that they would enjoy that spoke of our love for them. Kindles so they could read and play. After this senseless shooting, the gift was out of my mind and all I could think about was wanting to be present for my children.

Like many other parents, Adina and I spent the weekend deliberating what we should tell our children about the horrific shootings this past Friday. The school in Sandy Hook Elementary is about an hour away from our children’s school in Connecticut. We both knew that there was nothing really to talk about with Emunah (3) and Yishama (6), but what could be hope to say to Yadid (8) about the death of so many precious innocents? This past Monday night when  I got home I pulled Yadid into the kitchen to talk with him in private. I asked him what they talked about at school that day. He reported to me what the school had communicated to us the were going to messaged to him verbatim. I was happy. I asked him what he was thinking about, what he was feeling, and if he had any questions. Yadid said that was sad for what happened, but he wanted to talk “when the kids were not around.”While we did get to talk about it later, I am still moved at his sensitivity. Evidently Adina and I are not the only ones who was thinking about what the right way is to talk about such a difficult topic.

There were many ways of communicating our love to our children and many ways of helping  them deal with a crisis. In the end no presents will replace a long hug and being completely present in the moment.

Dependable Memory

Published December 29, 2011 1.09 VaYeshev , 1.1 Miketz , 1.11 VaYigash Leave a Comment
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In the Mishnah Tamid ( 7:4) we learn that the Messianic Era will be a time which is  sheKulu Shabbat- completely Shabbat. What does that mean? First we need to understand some basic ideas about Shabbat and the Messiah. So, Shabbat with all of the rules and regulations actually boils down to just two commandments, LeShmor V LeZchor- to guard and to remember. Most of what we know  is all of the things we cannot do on Shabbat. That would fall under the commandment “to guard” Shabbat. We remember the Shabbat most clearly with the Kiddush. The Shulchan Aruch (OH272) brings down an interesting idea. If we do not have enough money for Challah and wine we should actually make Kiddush over Challah.  But we will come back to this.

Now back to the idea of the Messiah. We often say that one should ignore the idea of the Messiah ben David, but we ignore the idea of the Messiah ben Yosef. Living most of history as a dispossessed people we overlook the physical redemption of the Messiah descended from Yosef in favor of the metaphysical/ spiritual redemption that is supposed to come from a descendent of David. This idea of a physical redeemer in Yosef is very clearly discussed in the past few Torah portions. It all comes to a head in Vayigash, this week’s Torah portion, when the hidden redeemer reveals his true identity to save his brothers.

Regardless of our station in life, on Shabbat we are transformed into kings presiding over our weekly feast. To anyone who keeps Shabbat in our lives, it is hard to imagine a world without Shabbat.  But if we tried to imagine a world without the comfort of family and community we do not need to look further then when Yosef himself was in prison. There he was in the pit without Shabbat, but he was with the head baker and the head butler of the Pharaoh. He interprets their dreams and asks to be remembered. Then we read:

And the butler did not remember Yosef and he forgot him. ( Genesis 41:23)

Yosef asks to be remembered and he is forgotten.  Many commentators suggest that this doubling of language suggests that the butler forgot him in the short-term and the long-term. It is easy to imagine why the butler might forget Yosef. Many of us assume that needing the help of others makes us weaker in some way. So in the short and long-term it was easier for the butler to think he was chosen or special then remembering that he was dependent on Yosef for anything.

What is the significance of this story of Yosef in the prison in the context of our Mishna in Tamid? Yosef was in the pit without Shabbat. Pharoah is the king and he is clearly not. There, Yosef was with the head of Challah and the Head of Kiddush. The head of Challah was going to be killed and the head of Kiddush was asked to remember the redeemer and forgets him. Every Shabbat we try to fix this by remembering Yosef when we make Kiddush. And if we do not have money for both we remember the Challah over the Kiddush.

In the Talmud,  Rav Yochanan said in the name of the Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochi:

If Israel were to keep two Shabbatot according to the laws, they would be redeemed immediately ( Shabbat 118b)

Surely if we remember what the butler forgot we could redeem the world. (Maybe for both the Messiah of Yosef and David) We all get help from people all the time. But, we let our egos get the best of us. If we took the time to reveal their good deeds it would help reveal the capacity of these hidden humble heroes to redeem the world. And, we would also reveal our own vulnerability. This itself might be the core of the Messianic Era. This will not be a time of independence or dependence, but radical interdependence.  Shabbat itself could be a taste of this. Take a moment this Shabbat to share how you were helped this week. This memory might itself bring us closer to that era.

- L’Kavod Ben Sales ( who taught me to love Shabbat in new ways) and his wife Rachel

“Just” Affiliate

Published December 7, 2010 1.1 Miketz , 1.11 VaYigash 1 Comment
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In 2004 when I started my years of being a Campus Rabbi I spent a lot of time trying to understand Hillel’s mission. In Hillel’s own memory it seems that at the outset Hillel was the pluralistic synagogue on campus. That eventually turned into the precursor to the “synaplex” on campus still only serving the needs of proto-synagogue Jews. In this Hillel enjoyed a certain movement from the sanctuary to the social hall, but it was caught in the grips of authenticity as defined by synagogue-centered Jewish life. Eventually Hillel tried to be a place in which Jewish students would do Jewish with other Jews. While this benefited from getting beyond the synagogue shadow, it lacked definition, rigor, or a clear drive to follow students’ passions. By the time I got there Hillel’s new mission had evolved into working toward “the significant survival of the Jewish people”.  While this clearly speaks to people’s passions, it does not speak to mine. For me survival is never good enough. The question for me was and still is, “What will be our contribution to the world as Jews”? This question is not limited to Hillel.

Looking at Miketz and VaYigash, last week’s and this week’s Torah portions, we are left with an interesting model for a Jew making a universal contribution in the character of Joseph. Last week Joseph contributed to the larger society by organizing them in preparation for the famine. Millions would have died if it was not for his insight and leadership. Once he meets his brothers who are driven from their homes in search of food, he is faced with a number of choices. Will he help them or not? This seems pretty obvious, they are his family and how else will he fulfil his childhood dream of having them bow down to him? But just because he saves them, it does not necessarily mean that he will disclose his identity. Joseph could have helped them and remained anonymous.  This week the drama is played out. Will Joseph’s contribution be as an individual or will he choose to be identified with his people?

The text reads, “Then Joseph could not refrain himself before all those who stood by him; and he cried, Cause every man to go out from me. And there stood no man with him, while Joseph made himself known to his brothers. And he gave his voice in tears; and the Egyptians and the house of Pharaoh heard.”(Genesis 45:1-2) At the outset we assume that Joseph is trying to come out to his brothers while stay closeted with his identity. He is an Ivri, descendent of Avraham, but the Egyptians do not need to know. When he finally opened up to his brothers, his voice knew no limits, and everyone found out about his identity.

If you contribute to the world around you, I would love to talk with you about finding a more articulate voice and to investigate how being Jewish is meaningful to your efforts. I have no hopes that you fit into some prefigured box. On the contrary I would love to imagine a Judaism that would meet your passions. For many of us, we identify with Judaism despite and not because of a prayer-centered synagogue Judaism. Working for social justice need not be marginalizing as a mere affinity; I believe being a Social Justice Jew could be an authentic affiliation.

Community is not something that you have to join; it is something you can choose to build. There is no doubt that this takes a lot of work, but think of the reward of connecting your passions to your personal and communal identities. My assumption is that connecting with other people to form community will make your contribution more sustainable. At first Joseph’s brothers did not recognize him. Similarly I have no doubt that it will take some time and effort for the organized Jewish community to see past the shadow of the synagogue and recognize contributing to the world as a Jew as a legitimate affiliation. At some point connecting this way to the Jewish community will be seen on par with affiliating with a religious or Zionist movement. So roll up your sleeves and make a sustainable gift to the world in the context of our community. Like Joseph, it is as important to identify as to be identified.

Joseph’s Avatar

Published December 24, 2009 1.11 VaYigash Leave a Comment

In this week’s Torah portion we see Joseph faced with a choice as to whether or not he will reveal himself to his brothers. Is he the little kid they tormented and put in a pit or the second most powerful person in Egypt. The text reads, “Then Joseph could not refrain himself before all those who stood by him; and he cried, “Cause every man to go out from me.” And there stood no man with him, while Joseph made himself known to his brothers. And he gave his voice in tears; and the Egyptians and the house of Pharaoh heard” (Genesis 45:1-2). He had closeted his identity as a son of Jacob to become the second most powerful man in the known world. When he finally opens up to his brothers, his voice knows no limits, and everyone finds out about his secret identity. Joseph’s life is informed by all of his experiences. He is more than the sum of these parts. In this intimate engagement with his brothers he is able to find a voice to fuse his identities.

It is hard to be reading this and not to reflect on the movie phenomena of Avatar. The crippled savior has to determine who he is. Is he the man with the mask or the man behind the mask? (Spoiler Alert!!)Like Joseph, when faced with the challenge to identify his true self he finds his voice in acting for a just cause. Like Joseph he goes native realizing his “true” nature.

A pleasant but otherwise hackneyed plotline, that seems to have been lifted from Joseph Campbell,  is redeemed the moment the viewer straps on his or her own 3-D glasses to experience the movie. In Aristotle’s terminology, the logos (the logical content of a speech) of Avatar is not that interesting but it becomes compelling in its lexis (the style and delivery of the message).  It is a science fiction version of having a Hassidic story in another Hassidic story. In watching the 3-D movie we join the main character’s exploration of a virtual reality and we experience the intersection of form and content. In this contemporary synesthesia the hero is revealed and in some way we too are transformed.  So to, when we read the Torah we are asked to put ourselves in as the 3-D and reread the narrative of our lives.

Like Pandora, the utopian backdrop of Avatar, Jewish camp is a unique place where we can become in tune with nature, try on new masks, leave wounds at home, and even “go native”. Like this week’s Torah portion, camp is a safe place where we can discern who we are in a safe family environment. By putting ourselves in the story we too can fuse together our narratives and become more than the sum of our parts. In retelling the story, there is no mask. People always say that camp is not a real place, it is too much like Pandora. I say, if it helps us reveal our inner nature and transforms us, it is as real as it gets.

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