This coming week marks Rosh Hodesh Av. As I have in years past, I have been reflecting how messed up the world was during the destruction of the Temples and our exiles from Israel. This year as I prepare for Tisha B’Av I think about how messed up this world is right now. How have we failed our children? It is grim. It is very hard spending time remembering our past destructions without a sense of doom.

As part of this process I have found myself listening to Amen Al HaYeladim by Hanan Ben Ari. Along with the video is a truly a haunting song:

There he sings:

I’m still terrified that…

I won’t make it in time

To guard, to save, to rescue

To take the bullet for them

Oh, how vulnerable is the heart

I pray that my kids

Won’t inherit my scars( issues)

That they’d embrace each other

As Jews we love our children. What would we not do for them? The breach of October 7th reminded us of the Holocaust and oh so many pogroms throughout our history when we were helpless to protect our children. We all carry a deep sadness that we have not done enough for our children.

Cognitively we know that this time will be different because for the first time in 2000 years we have a state and an army that will be there to protect us. But it still feels like a painful return to Jewish memory that Zionism had promised to disrupt. We are reminded of the profoundly Jewish anxiety that we will not make it in time to guard, save, or rescue our children. And even when I know that we will we survive this, I am still saddened that another generation will have to inherit our scars and our issues. Our trauma is not just nature and epigenetics, it is also nurture and conditioning. But I refuse to be fated to terror. Our destiny is hope.

So, where will we find hope? Hanan Ben Ari, says it so well. We will find promise that our children will embrace each other. It is in these moments when we can trust that they will take care of each other even when we are gone.

For these reasons I love this picture of Yishama and Yadid. They are in their happy place at Camp Stone. It makes me happy to see them embracing each other. This is my prayer for all of our children.